Happy Thanksgiving to you, too. Now quit calling me jerkface, jerkface.
Brain Vomit
He screamed. Loudly. Had anyone been around, they would have thought him a lunatic. Had they known the reason, they probably would have understood. Well, probably not.
The song played on and he continued singing along with it. He enjoyed long drives. He could play the most eclectic songs on his iPod and actually enjoyed being able to listen to more than the two songs he would usually get in on the drive into work. Sometimes there are drawbacks to living so close to work.
He continued singing. Being so focused on his music and what he would call, “rocking out,” he neglected to see the DPS patrol unit stopped on the shoulder of I-10. He saw the lights in the rear view mirror. If the cop car had sirens, he sure as hell didn’t hear them. He pulled over and rolled down his window. The heat was almost unbearable.
“Turn the engine off, son,” the DPS officer said, hand on his firearm. The engine was promptly shut off and the heat became completely unbearable. “Do you know why I pulled you over?” asked the officer.
“I would guess it has something to do with me speeding because I was rocking out,” he responded.
“You would be right,” responded the officer. “What uh… what exactly are you listening to?”
“Heh. Pixies. Ever heard of them?” he asked, instinctively pulling out his wallet.
The officer smiled, rolled back his sleeve and showed a phrase tattooed on his shoulder which read: If man is five, then the devil is six and God is SEVEN. In chorus, they both sang, “This monkey’s gone to heaven!”
They both started laughing. The cop seemed alright. Maybe, he thought, he’s gonna get away with this. The cop drew his attention back on him. “You’re lucky I’m a Pixies fan. Get out of here, drive safe and pay attention. The rest of the cops from here on are overweight with a chip on their shoulder.” He nodded and the cop walked back to his car, singing silently to himself a song which was likely a Pixies song. He put his wallet back into his pocket, turned the engine over, and rolled up the window. The feel of the air conditioning was great on his now very hot face.
“Next stop, home.”
Desiderata by Max Ehrmann (c. 1920)
Go placidly amid the noise and haste, and remember what peace there may be in silence.
As far as possible, without surrender, be on good terms with all persons. Speak your truth quietly and clearly; and listen to others, even to the dull and the ignorant, they too have their story. Avoid loud and aggressive persons, they are vexations to the spirit.
If you compare yourself with others, you may become vain and bitter; for always there will be greater and lesser persons than yourself. Enjoy your achievements as well as your plans. Keep interested in your own career, however humble; it is a real possession in the changing fortunes of time.
Exercise caution in your business affairs, for the world is full of trickery. But let this not blind you to what virtue there is; many persons strive for high ideals, and everywhere life is full of heroism. Be yourself. Especially, do not feign affection. Neither be cynical about love, for in the face of all aridity and disenchantment it is perennial as the grass.
Take kindly to the counsel of the years, gracefully surrendering the things of youth. Nurture strength of spirit to shield you in sudden misfortune. But do not distress yourself with imaginings. Many fears are born of fatigue and loneliness.
Beyond a wholesome discipline, be gentle with yourself. You are a child of the universe, no less than the trees and the stars; you have a right to be here. And whether or not it is clear to you, no doubt the universe is unfolding as it should.
Therefore be at peace with God, whatever you conceive Him to be, and whatever your labors and aspirations, in the noisy confusion of life, keep peace in your soul.
With all its sham, drudgery and broken dreams, it is still a beautiful world.
Be cheerful. Strive to be happy.